My birthday passed, with no one close to me taking initative to do something fun with me.
And it scares me. So much that I know dont have confidence to ask anyone else if they want to do something, afraid of getting a "no" I guess.
I simply isn't someone that people want to hang out with. Time to shift focus.
Since I've already "lost" in this aspect, I'll try to win in something else, to keep myself from crumbling down and die in thoughts.
This is where my training comes in. Training gives a happiness based on my own actions, happiness that isnt based on anyone else. The same goes with making paintings or poetry (as the ones I add on here). They make me feel like I accomplish something.
I'm feeling an inner stress right now that is VERY strong, I need to gain some strength here, fast.
So therefor I end this post now. Peace.
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