Sunday, January 16, 2011
Sleepless fucking shithellmotherfuck.
Couldnt sleep last night so what did I do?, I started creating... poetry and a new pianocomposition, but it all turned out like a retarded donkeys arsehole, PERFECT a wasted night and tiredness times a milion... ready for work... seriously life.. fuck off.
Dreams no more
Who I wanted to become...
Faded away
What I wanted to achieve...
Is no more
The dreams I had...
Were stolen in my sleep
What I wanted to hold...
Was never mine
And all I have left is a memory... of what I never accomplished
Nothingness gives me calm, as I realise the truth
I am already dead, and has been... from youth
Thursday, January 6, 2011
Breaking the selfbuilt prison
desperatly trying to find
something that connects this madness
a place of clarity behind
ending up with unknown adress
so now Im laying here,
on my bed
when thoughts like fear
passes through my head
I'm afraid for people to know
the fraility that lives inside
and the weakness will only grow
for I never show that side
its in the dark
the sensation is awoken
ignites a spark
when poetry is spoken
depression is captured in creation
making it into something real
it creates a mental elevation
where you can see the way you feel
I hope I can inspire
Others feeling the same
To create the clensing fire
To use poetry without shame
something that connects this madness
a place of clarity behind
ending up with unknown adress
so now Im laying here,
on my bed
when thoughts like fear
passes through my head
I'm afraid for people to know
the fraility that lives inside
and the weakness will only grow
for I never show that side
its in the dark
the sensation is awoken
ignites a spark
when poetry is spoken
depression is captured in creation
making it into something real
it creates a mental elevation
where you can see the way you feel
I hope I can inspire
Others feeling the same
To create the clensing fire
To use poetry without shame
Monday, January 3, 2011
The Answer To Misery
In every part of the world
Misery is spreading
Our view of life is twirled
Purity of people are shredding
Instead of trying to understand
We judge and hate
A complete explanation we demand
We leave no room for debate
We are made this way
Because we believe it's strong
To never from our beliefs stray
This way is obviously wrong
Pushed into never showing our weak side
Believing it will make us stronger
But this only makes us hide
We remain ourselves no longer
And as we fail to be true
We feel like something is lost
And so we do what we do
To feel better no matter the cost
This starts the reaction
Of endless searching for power
But we never get more than a fraction
As in lies we ourselves devour
-
End of part I
Love in it's purest form
I want to love every part
Good and bad
For you have invaded my heart
Like no one ever had
The thought of losing you made me fear
So I tried to gain control
Manipulating what I held dear
And so time took it's toll
I loved you for who you were when we met
Now I've made you weak
The shining sun you were is about to set
And I'm too embaressed to speak
The one I loved exists no longer
For I have destroyed your self-asteem
I wish I was stronger
So I could have told you what I mean
One should love and cherish
A person for who they are
When truth and honesty reign, love will never perish
We have to find someone willing to go that far
Stuck and crushed by lies
I was taught to be one way
To cloak my fear and hide
Strong in rumours I aimed to stay
Fake smile, tear down my side.
Feeling it's too late
In loneliness I'm stuck
When I let feelings inflate
I'm all out of luck
When one only shows strength
Distance taken by fear
Will seem like ignorance
And pain shifts up a gear
Being too weak to tell the truth
I let people paint that picture of me
Now that it has ruined my youth
It's too late to make everyone see
There's no energy or time
To make everyone else understand
My thoughts become poetry and rhyme
Opened link from heart to hand
Loneliness has always been an issue
Created by the curse of being someone I'm not
It left me crying, taking another tissue
Locked in a shell to rot
I'm done hiding
It's time for the real to show
No more social-based-deciding
In truth and time I'll grow
Saturday, January 1, 2011
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